!LOVESTORIES

{Saturday, September 30, 2006}

back in office on a saturday..
suddenly, all plans cancelled..
im so alone now..

out of so many names & nick on msn, how many exactly will chat with you.
And with topics to chat?
a few i suppose..
then are people from the virtual world trustworthy enuff to make friends with?
do they really wish to make friends or....?
will making friends with them makes u a desperado?
will making friends with them makes u a flirt?
is making friends with them is for filling up the emptiness you have in you?

hmmmm.........




I guess when one got so used to a certain "thing/person/object/aim",
and when that certain "__" disappear from you...
you feel lost..

i lost that " something " in my life...
and i crave so much for it now...
yet i wish not to have it anymore...
contradicting eh?

im so aimless now..
22 years & nothing accomplished...
too late for regret...
n now i wish that chance will come...
for me to do something for myself...

you guys might not understand my entry.. but its okay.. =)
its for my own memories..





One boy, one girl,
Two hearts beating wildly,
To put it mildly, it was love at first sight.
He smiled, she smiled, and they knew right away
This was the day they'd been waiting for all their lives.
For a moment the whole world
Revolved around one boy, and one girl

i wish you understand more at 5:04 pm

{Thursday, September 28, 2006}

Hello people......

Im helping my boss sell animal calender for yr 2007?
going at $10/copy...
will go to animal shelter.. noahs ark...
http://www.noahsarklodge.com/

if u r interested in 1.. please sms me k?
help me look look ask ask ard too.. :)

sheena & cookie - i got ur copy with me liao..

i wish you understand more at 6:01 pm


July Baby


Fun to be with. Secretive.
Difficult to fathom and to be understood.
Quiet unless excited or tensed.
Takes pride in oneself.
Has reputation.
Easily consoled.
Honest.
Concerned about people's feelings.
Tactful. Friendly. Approachable.
Emotional temperamental and unpredictable.
Moody and easily hurt.
Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times.
Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets.
dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things.
Guides others physically and mentally.
Sensitive and forms impressions carefully.
Caring and loving. Treats others equally.
Strong sense of sympathy.
Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations.
Hardworking. No difficulties in studying.
Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends.
Waits for friends. Never looks for friends.
Not aggressive unless provoked.
Loves to be loved.
Easily hurt but takes long to recover.
xxxx

my messy table.

I cant be bothered to clear it up for the whole of last n this week.

Let it pile.. let it pile~~

=)


i wish you understand more at 3:53 pm

{Wednesday, September 27, 2006}

i like the weather outside the office now..
i can smell the earth & feel the wind..
n the feeling is great cause the environment wasnt so noisy..
the pace is relaxed...
everything is peaceful...
i like..
n now its raining.. what a rainy rainy day.. =)
***
diana: heee.. that was thought of the day ma. haha.. =)
***
now i can blog in peace..
nobody in e office except me..
n im like so damn tired la.
the rest are at meeting for 2 full days..
the new boss is so **** la..
got home ard 1230am ytd lor..
cause i needa take bus home after dinner-ed, pool-ed & dessert-ed with panda & kiez...
tired tired tired..
haa~ but it was fun..
esp the birdshit!!! =)
tralalala.. *smear some on panda face!!!*
***
pictures later on...

i wish you understand more at 12:30 pm

{Monday, September 25, 2006}










all alone in e morning @ ECP













how nice to have a home by the beach eh?



















i made my name on the sand! haa~~










got relli bored & emo.. hAA! i think when u are all alone, u tends to think alot & get sad all over it.. =P somemore im by the beach.. peaceful etc... sheesh...













and i looked dwn.. i feel like jumping in.. but the thought of drowning puts me off.. LOL!!
n i thought of y wld ppl jump dwn the MRT track when trying to commit sucide.

1. Drowning - If you know how to swim, its probably impossible to drown urself unless u get urself dead drunk n jump in / u took alot of drugs or whatsoever...
- If you doesnt know how to swim, like me. You will be struggling etc. Thats relli a painful way to die rite? with all e water going into ur lungs etc. shite..

2. drug overdose like paracetamol? - You need to eat at least if im not wrong more than 500 tablets to induce drug overdose & it doesnt mean you will die too.. at most ur stomach get pump relli bad. hAA!

3. Jump dwn from the tall building - WAH! tts scary to look dwn from sucha a high place. Most prob will be put off by the sight below la.. Unless you wan to feel like a bird lor. But what if halfway thru, u regret e choice, no turning back liao lei.

4. MRT track - FAST & SWIFT. Not sure whether you feel any pain when the collision takes place la. No time for you to think too much & No chance for you to regret .. =)

i wish you understand more at 9:45 pm

{Friday, September 22, 2006}

i think im very useless...

i have e urge to call..
n get my answer for this cold shit im getting...

grrrr.......
its spoiling my day & my mood....
*GrOwL*

i wish you understand more at 9:43 pm

{Thursday, September 21, 2006}

fuck..
i thought i was fine...
but im not sure whether i was just sore over it...
it doesnt feel good when im being ignored...
by you...
-sheesh-

absolutely lousy feeling.
Let see wats the outcome...
i am very sure i have this determination not to give in...

i may feel "empty"
i may be lonely
i may be sad
i may be stressed

but.. im sure I WILL SURVIVE!!
muahahahaha...
cause mOon` is always a strong girl..
=] *gRinz*

i wish you understand more at 10:05 pm


i need C.A.S.H... n i mean alot alot of it...
-sigh-
tell me where to get it in 3 months time?


****


anyway, spotted this somewhere...
quite irrelevant la.. so? =]
















****

another irrelevant one...







i wish you understand more at 10:01 pm


i re-read my blog entries & i noe my english is atrocious but please hang in there.. haha...

hmm.. come to think of it...
it was less than 5 days away from my bdae when everything starts to break apart..

one moment happy and another moment sad..

gwad!

i wish you understand more at 1:41 am

{Wednesday, September 20, 2006}

out of e blue, i sunk into a mode of very very sucky mood.... -sigh- very alone.. very sad.. very e i dunno what to say.. sheesh.. so i decided to post random pics..

e playgrd in LIM CHU KANG.. our fave playground.. =)
Sweet & sour pork that i cooked for mummy!
Qn:How do i know that the weight im gaining have gone too? Ans: When the jeans i wore felt tighter at the butt & thighs region. And a bulge seen at my tummy!!!!








taken @ shaun's place


WANT TO FIGHT HUH? COME LA!! =D

i wish you understand more at 4:27 pm


diana: i dint say i missed you. I jus said i thought of you!! hahaha~~! kidding..... thought & MISSED you too ya.. when am i going to see you woman? =)
****
dinner @ hme last nite made me feel like i have clogged my artries like ten times more, increasing my chances of heart attack lor. The stewed or whatever pork that my mum made was like pure FATS!!! with little or no meat...
or mayb the meat had already been dissolved like what my mum said.... --> "na ge rou zhu dao hen lan liao" >_<"" leaving the fats.... i can see it!! n feel it!! n i felt damn nauseau & sinful after finishing it all.. *eeeuk*
****
tralalala~
all alone in e office now. Slogged the whole morning away by myself. =(
one on half day leave, e other one on course... sheesh... i wish for more sundays & leave.. haha

i wish you understand more at 10:57 am

{Tuesday, September 19, 2006}

suddenly.....
out of e blue.....

i thought of diana.....
=/

i wish you understand more at 6:17 pm


-while waiting for the hair to dry-

jus came back from dinner with bin, hui, jan & bin's cousin...
thought ting will come along budden she gotta clear some stock hme.. so dint managed to meet up with her....
Chill Chill & chat chat at Lucky Plaza Macs...
kenna suan-ed big time there & at work today lor..

malaysian girl, ah lian, minah, pai kia... what else? cant rem...
why?!? cause i bleached my whole head of hair... =/
heez... now its so damn fucking bright la...
but not to worry...
i will dye another colour when i visit the saloon 2 weeks later.. =)
IF i do go la... haha

Before bleaching the hair ytd, i went to Raffles Town Club (RTC) for a massage & facial, courtesy of my Da Jie...
During the facial, she tried to squeeze my pimple away.. (n its not little lor) with dunno what equpiment la.. BLOODY PAINFUL i tell u... esp my nose lor.. *CURSING AWAY SIA*
then the tears came out la.. Lol... n she still ask very painful ah.. =/ but overall she was a relli nice & friendly lady.. I like.. hee

next came e massage.. WOAH! damn big size la that woman.. n she damn hard on me lor.. Untying the bloody knot on my shoulders.. Now it super sore now lor.. N bloody hell i have to carry the stupid mice cages lor.. Damn heavy la..

i think i curse alot nowsaday... sianz.. wonder whats wrong with me now.. haha




anyone can tell me where to earn big $$?
-sobs-

i wish you understand more at 1:37 am

{Thursday, September 14, 2006}

If one day you feel like crying...
Call me.
I don't promise that I will make you
laugh,
But I can cry with you.

**********************************************

If one day you want to run away--
Don't be afraid to call me.
I don't promise to ask you to stop...
But I can run with you.

**********************************************

If one day you don't want to listen
to anyone...
Call me.
I promise to be there for you.
And I promise to be very quiet.

**********************************************

But if one day you call...
And there is no answer...
Come fast to see me.
Perhaps I need you 2.


to all my frens...
this is what i am willing to do for you...
will you do the same for me?

+++++++++++

Dear DUMDUM,

* Persevere in whatever you are doing now, Im sure that the rewards will come. (Dean's List included)
** Stay cheerful!! A happy mind makes DUMDUM feels good and everything DUMDUM do will goes smoothly too.... =)
*** Not sure what happened to DUMDUM recently. But im sure DUMDUM have friends who do appreciate DUMDUM!!
**** You know im not a good talker nor one who noes how to console or give advices.. But like what i put at the beginning of the post, i will stay very quiet while DUMDUM rant DUMDUM's "grievances" away... =]
***** Sometimes frens like me needs DUMDUM too. DUMDUM should go out with us and not bury himself somewhere he goes crazy doing it almost 24 hrs a day.
****** I just wanna tell DUMDUM don't not to put too much stress on yourself alrighty? I dun wan a grumpy DUMDUM who always complain that i mistreat him when DUMDUM himself loves to scold me.
******* Lastly, a PT DUMDUM doesnt mean not important k? =D

-smile!!!-
cause you have sucha nice fren who is willing to write an entry for a DUMDUM... HAHAHA!!

++++++++++

tralalalala..
im super dejected now la..
~sigh~


i wish you understand more at 11:42 pm


super uber bored in the office.
i wish im not working..
i wish im studying..
yet i wish im not studying cos i guess my engine is switched off/never on before...
-sigh-
what is this man..? =(


whats so nice about me?
nothing is good..
fugly & attitude
lazy & insensitive...
jus give up n be normal buddies... =]

urgh..i also dunno what to blog...
ppl tag me lei.. so bored with no tags.. LOL!!!

i miss desmond.. n the him that i nv knew who he is...
*pengZ*

MUAHAHAHAHAHAH!!
im a crazy girl today..

i wish you understand more at 3:43 pm

{Wednesday, September 13, 2006}

I think im too bored.. so tadah... here i am loading some useless fotos.. lol
















tIng's BirthdaY






i wish you understand more at 12:56 am

{Tuesday, September 12, 2006}

aWwwwWWwWWWWW......
I nEeda start afresh & pUt that behiNd myself...
Im GoNna live My LifE a DiffEreNT one fRom the PasT 3 Years...
Im goNnA meEt New FrENs...
iM gOinG tO fiNd sOMeTHinG woRthY AbOUt MysElf tO lOve...
im GoIng to LeARn & aApreCiate tHIngs & PeoPLe ArouNd me...
I dig PEIZHI..... =)

Loves You MUCH MUCH! *mUAckZ*
** ~~ KamSAHaMiDa~~ **
mUaHahHAhahAHha...
n Im GoiNG To NeeD YOu gUYS to HelP me too.. =)
******
hOpe That yoU are feELing BettEr Ger...
n I hope You STay StrOng tOo...
n I alSo hoPe You CaN dO it Like mE...
n I alSO duN RegRet ASkinG u to MAke That CHoice...
hOpe u MeSsAgE Me Soon About The TalK lASt nITe ya...
even thou u dun even noe about my blog.. =D
**^^ trAlLAlalLALa~~~~~~

i wish you understand more at 6:26 pm

{Monday, September 11, 2006}

smile!
(Lyric from M.Jackson - Smile)

Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though it's breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile

That's the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile


i think tts wat i have been trying to do so..
but after reading this on someone's blog, i now know why i have been doing this...
n i hope im doing fine being like this. Hee.. =)

i wish you understand more at 11:30 am

{Sunday, September 10, 2006}

awwww... im so addicted to the korean dramas la... *sniff* *sniff*
I think i wanna learn korean now. MuaHahahAH!! =D
head over heels in love with you....... =)
that SHIN is a character from the korean drama la... - points finger @ kelly n laugh at him!! -

*****************

tim-sum-ed ytd with the family at Fortunate restaurant, toa payoh. Head dwn to the HDB hub to support a fren who was joining in the superstar thingy. But too bad, she was sitting in the enclosed area already and couldnt speak to her at all.. -sigh-

Supposed to go for some coffee with my poly mates. But was changed to a dinner instead.. HAA! one of them was supposed to pass me DVDs for korean drama "Goong".. In the end he was late for more than 3 hrs for the dinner @ Bakerzinn and WORST! he forgot to bring it. !&*@^%#%@$%^$^!@

initial plan was to head dwn to MOMO to try out e new place. In the end, princess me decided to head back to O Bar. Dun ask me why.. LOL.. i also dunno. Mayb more familiar or whatsoever. Hee...
JJ had a 1-for-1 vodka ribena which he had already paid so me, sheena, xl & jj went into MOMO to finish up those before leaving. HEE.. n my face was already red & hot when i only had half a glass. Lousy right?
crowd wasnt there till the 1-for-1 hour @ 12 midnite. Stupid kelly dint wan to come.. LOL.. so i cant get drunk! -kidding- i dun intend to anyway..
I had a good time sitting down there with lynn & peizhi. Pushed the rest to the dancefloor.. =D
i jus cant understand why the rest are so bent on getting me drunk. -sigh-
i wasnt like really depressed or met with something not happy. I was the usual yuexiu.. I gained my freedom..
Mayb i shd be like what lynn says... Be crazy & get myself do stupid things since im able to do so now.. but cannot la.. i SHY!! I SHY!!
YEA!! i dint puke ytd nite.. i think i shdnt drink tequila shot. I think those are the ones that makes me puke. Hee.. =) Oh.. n i think i skipped that part on getting high.. so its basically.. Drink drink drink --> Stoned & sleepy and not the Drink drink drink --> High & crazy --> drunk/stoned & sleepy.. =D

I was just complaining about no cute guys around for my eyes to Feast on when this guy served drinks to our table.I tot to myself... eh... this guy not bad.. HAHA.. quite cute. And the next moment, lynn said the exact same thing to me.. MUAHAHAHAH... heng sia.. my taste still okay la.. haha..
And they were all pushing me to him la.. And lynn sabo-ed me lor. Asked him for his name & status lor. said i would like to know him.. >_<''' so awkward la... best was she asked him to walk around our table more often.. *pEnGz* and the best was, junjie took 1 shooter and offered him, citing that i was the one buying him the drink. Weet~~ whats that manz.. HAHA.. but it was funny la.. And i told that guy(desmond) that jj was just kidding. Hee... =D... mayb i shd jus be more daring and ask for his number eh? for fun lor.. doesnt mean i mus give him a call or wat... or take a photo or something? Lol... mayb its the dark that made him looks better lei? haaa..... Make friends ma.. next time can ask him book table for us!! But i guess i wasnt attractive enuff... cos he bo chaped me la.. *saddening sia*

Oh yah.. my dearest peizhi was so scared i kenna conned by my poly mate also.. HAHA.. His name is jason.. N he is like my friend for 3 yrs in poly & WAS my good fren bf at that time. She dun allow me to lean on him!! cos i was like very near him when we talked.. So i cannot lean on ppl that i do not know/do not know well or do not club with before.. So ppl, lend me ur shoulders when i need them for my heavy head k? Lynn was saying sth like flirting with him lor.. I was like opps.. was that flirting? i dint noe that.. =D
While dearest zhi tries to make me stay away from him, sheena kept wanting to push me to him.. thinking he is my new fling.. =D I got such lovely friends.. *muackz*
























i met him outself O bar for awhile. He was at butterfactory... hmm... if i dint see him, im very fine and good. But i dint know that actually somewhere in my heart that i do misses him somehow. N its kinda like want to tear when he walks away. He came over to pass me some cash cos he was afraid i got not enuff $ to get home and eat next week. -sigh- no matter how i tell him i had enuff. he jus wldnt listen. Oh well.. I will transfer it back to him then..
its not that i do not wanna give u another chance... its just that i wan to be free of all these.. be single & unavailable.. to be surrounded by my friends once again...
.. im sorry..

i wish you understand more at 5:16 pm

{Saturday, September 02, 2006}

i miss you even though i do not know who you are...

n i look fwd to seeing you down that road, that bus, that street...

you have this ability to make my day a better one...

i wish you understand more at 3:37 pm


i got so much thoughts in me that its overflowing outta my "i-know-not-big" (yes yes mr kelly) brain... but somehow, its weird that it kinda dissipates when i tried to put dwn in words.

what is love?
exactly.... anyone?
as time passes.. 1 day to 1 month, 1 month to 1 year and so on...
after so many of the tomorrows... how have the love you had initially evolved?
to something deeper that only you yourself knows?
or to something that even you yourself is unsure?
i have seen so much of break ups using that the feeling have faded, incompatible etc..

[Pardon me for drifting.. my male fren in poly recently broke up with his gf.. and he was so upset over it. He showed his then gf (E) a picture they took when they 1st started. Loving, sweet & smitten no doubt. And he asked E, do you realise now you dun love me as much as last time? And E agreed.. E asked for a break thinking it was unfair to him. And told him to give her some time to think about it. She mentioned that he was the perfect guy for him but yet the feeling had faded.. She is confident to get it back, but she needs time.......

i was surprised.. how did he noe she doesnt love him as much? And how does She knows the feeling had faded? for him, it was E actions & the way she talked to him. For E? i have no idea cos i doesnt know her..

He came to question me wat are the reason one would give to stay apart? My answers at that time was jus some random thoughts.. Such as bored? feeling faded? unhappiness accumulated? etc etc..
He was angry.. real angry with my answers..
How could one say such a irresponsible things such as bored?
And how could one feeling fades? He only knows his was deeper & deeper each passing days.
He say E is going to be the last girl shd she nv to return to him... He will nv be out with another girl anymore... How sad is that gg to be...

My fren.. you are a really sentimental guy. A very nice guy who can makes a girl living in bliss.. Like you say, you may be a boring boyfriend but you will be a very good husband. I trust you with all i have. Cause.. i met someone similar... like you too. =) nevertheless, i wish you happiness and may E comes back to you. ]

Can one's feeling faded cause you have been with this particular person for too long.. That everything that you do and say seems to be a routine. You got bored with it.. You wish to make new people, you wish alot of others too. Unhappiness with him came into the picture.. you quarrel... and you ended it with we are incompatible...
Can?
Or izzit... your love was not deep enough to withstand the obstacle that comes your way? N you wasnt strong enough to walk hand in hand with him & say.. "hey.. i'll stay by u n cross this hurdle with you..."
Can?
Or izzit you are just a fuck up person who wanna try try & have some fun in this r/s...

hais.. im being pessimistic here la.. Hahah.. I think i'll nv make a good gf.
When i was young-ER that time. I often thought how was it possible to face someone so much. Will you end up having nothing to say, nothing to do, nothing to share...? How was it possible for me.. to be with someone else?
I tried finally... in a really unexpected way..
How much i have given to him in this r/s only he knows.. And how much he have given, i noes... N i know its alot alot for him. I thank you from the bottom of my heart..

yes people, i know my nicks on msn is kinda weird recently...
n i definately knows u care for me...(u noe who u are ppl.. =])

But there also some who are super duper KPO that wants to noe what is happening in somebody's else life.. get lost if i really dun wanna say anything.

I shall put a full stop right here & my nick will still be the one full of lyrical mood.. =)
dont probe anymore..... you keep your guesses with you & my answers to myself...

你想要的
我却不能够给你我全部
我能给的
却又不是你想要拥有的
我们不适合也不想认输



i wish you understand more at 2:03 pm

!THELOVED

mOon`
forever 21!
4th July



!<3
my chu family
*sniff*
company of friends
the humblepiers
slacking & rotting
hockey

!have

hallucinative mind
sensitive personality
"fertile" imagination! =D

! *heart* these

Digi cammie ( )
Polaroid Cammie ( )
Bikini (2sets!!)(X)
US trip 13/07-29/07 (X)
Aus trip ( )
BBK trip ( )
Taiwan trip 09/08-14/08 (X)
Trip to HongKong ( )
Birkenstock/papillio (X)
Havanas (X)
Girlie slip-ons ( )
Advance Theory ( )
Car License ( )
anything from Tiff & Co ( )



! wish upon a star..

Study study study chance
More time with friends
More confident
Everlasting hope
To start afresh & forget the past

!HISTORY
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007


dwell back on bad ol' days!! *RoaR*
!EXITS

links here please? (:

!spit it all out!




!KUDOS

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    !mY otHer wOrld



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